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By the end of the first session, I remember feeling that I had barely passed the test of not being like his mother, who had never listened to him. Lucky for us, my capacity to hear with empathy was not compromised as I stood, squatted, and sat with him through the hour. Yet I also remember how tense I had felt, because he had been one of the few clients who seemed furious at me for being injured. I was desperate for another consultation, but I still could not sit long enough to make the hour-long drive to see my psychologist in those early months.

Because of the conjoined nerves, he did Support for the Journey not want to risk more problems with the potential of surgically touching two nerves instead of one. If it had been only one nerve strand, he could more easily have moved around it to get to the disc. He still believed the cortisone might eventually work in reducing the swelling of the nerve root. It could take up to ten days for any relief. In the meantime he wanted to check the weakness again in my left leg. After he performed the tests, we both agreed that my left toe seemed to hold a little longer than before, and so did my left foot when he pressed down on it.

Once damaged, they could not bounce back like the springy cushion they were meant to provide for the spine. Healthy discs are like shock absorbers, protecting the vertebrae from rubbing bone to bone, or worse, crashing into one another every time we sit down. They give us a smooth ride while also preventing real structural damage that would certainly occur without them. At the time of my injury, I did not know any of this—only that the unrelenting pain in my back, like an acute toothache in the very center of me, shattered my previous vision of the healing process, made me a beginner again.